A visit is where a town stops being an idea and becomes a real place, for you and for your family. The book's advice is to treat the first family trip like a first date: make a great impression, or there may not be another.
That means two kinds of trips. The first shows your family the best the town has to offer. The ones after that show you the whole truth, including the parts that never make the brochure.
Do your homework before the first trip
The book says your first job, before you bring the family, is to get to know the town yourself: where the best restaurants are and all the fun things to do. Have a plan that offers something for every person in the family.
Start online with the town's website and events calendar, the chamber of commerce, the local newspaper and community groups. Our wish list can help you write down what each family member must have, and what they'd simply like to have.
One small-town perk: you'll rarely need reservations, so you can walk in almost anywhere. The book says that's all the more reason to plan an action-packed, totally enjoyable day. Your goal is to hear someone in the family say, "Wow, I wish we could live here!"
Ask the people who know
If you run short of ideas, the book suggests talking to the local chamber of commerce or a real estate broker. Old-timers may know things you'd never think of.
When you talk with them, ask:
- What do people do on a Friday night? On a Sunday afternoon?
- Where do people buy groceries, see a doctor and go for a nice dinner?
- What has changed here in the last few years, and what's coming?
- What do newcomers wish they had known before they moved?
- What's the hardest month of the year here, and why?
Make the drive part of the fun
The book is firm on this one: nothing turns a family off faster than a boring car ride. Plan a few fun stops along the way, bring drinks and snacks for everyone, play music the whole family likes, and stop often.
Use the drive for research, too. The book's advice is to test-drive the distance between the town and any city you'd still need to visit. An interstate at 70 miles per hour is a very different trip than a farm road at 45.
Then go back and see the whole town
The first-date visit sells the town. The next visits test it. Here's what to look for.
Different times of day and night. The book warns that a house that looks great at 2 p.m. can take on a whole different feel at 10 p.m., when the town changes for the night. A busy street that seems fine at midday can drive you nuts when people race their cars down it after dark. Frank even spent a night sleeping in a chair in the house he was buying, during his due diligence period, just to see what it was like.
A weekday and a weekend. A weekday shows you the working town: school traffic, which businesses are open, where people eat lunch and what closes early. A weekend shows you the social town: games, church, events and who turns out for them.
The season you'd dread most. If you hate snow, visit in the depths of winter. If heat wears you down, go in the middle of summer. In a tourist town, see it at the peak of the season and again in the off-season. In a college town, see it during the school year and during summer break, when the book says the whole town takes on a different feel.
The roads after a storm. If you can, drive the route to the house you like after heavy rain or snow. You'll learn which roads get cleared and which ones you'd rather avoid.
Things to do on every visit
- Tour the schools if you have children, and picture your child there. If the school year is on, go to a game; the book says it's a good chance to see the parents and how families get along.
- Eat where the locals eat. Breakfast at the café will tell you more than any website.
- Read the bulletin boards at the grocery store, the post office and the library. That's where a small town posts what's really going on.
- Drive to the essentials: the hospital, the big grocery store, the pharmacy and the vet. Time each trip.
- Check the internet at any house you like, especially if you work from home. Our article on working remotely from a small town shows how to check a specific address.
- Spend a night in the country if you're thinking about a farm or ranch. The book suggests a weekend at someone else's place, or even a dude ranch, to find out whether your family can sleep through pitch-black nights, mooing cows and howling coyotes.
Keep notes while it's fresh
Take photos and jot down notes at every stop: what you loved, what bugged you, what you forgot to ask. That evening, score the town against your wish list while the details are still sharp. After a few towns, the visits start to blur together, and your notes will settle a lot of friendly arguments.
Talk it over as a family
On the drive home, ask each person what they liked and what worried them, and really listen. The book is honest that even one unhappy family member can cause serious problems for the plan, so hear every concern early. Our guide to getting your family on board has more on that conversation, and choosing a town can help you weigh your finalists.
If a town still looks good after a night visit, a weekday and a dreary-season trip, it's worth a serious look.
The free book's chapter on making the first impression on the family has more ideas for that first trip. Get your copy here.